Half inch Heroes History

Half inch Heroes will be supporting ska punk sensation JESSE JAMES and Howards Alias at the Tunbridge Wells Forum on April 5th. However, we will have a stand in bass player, Mike Hills (ex My Dad Is Big) because Ross is away snowboarding (lucky bastard). The whole set is being recorded live so please come along and cheer, scream and shout to all our songs. Book your tickets online at www.twforum.co.uk see you all there!

RECORDING DATES! 16th and 17th April 2003 to record our second EP. The name of it is currently unconfirmed, as soon as I have news of it I will post an update.

You can now click on the Half inch Heroes graffiti to view the guestbook before you sign it - no excuses for blank entries now!


4th February 2003

Kerrang magazine are hosting a competition to win a tour with Farse. Half inch Heroes have sent off a demo as well as a band biography in hope to try and go on tour with Farse across the South East. What we would like all you guys to do is email Farse and big up the Half inch Heroes and tell them that you want us to go on tour with them! The email address is ffarse@hotmail.com (yes it does have two f's) or if that email address is being a biatch try farse_2000@hotmail.com - hopefully one of them will work!

1st January 2003

HAPPY NEW YEAR! All be it a little late. This year HiH have higher aims, more aspiration and the determination to reach the top. We are now, after all, a year old! We are in the process of welcoming a trumpet player, enhancing our horn section. He goes by the name of Sam and with his collection of eight trumpets (Sam dude, correct me if I'm missing a few!) we're destined to have a brighter sound to our music. A fantastic song was written the other day, called ANY OTHER NAME and is just damn right wikid (if I do say so myself). As for gigs, we have none confirmed as yet but will keep you all posted. My final word is an apology about the state of the guestbook, I'll do my best to sort that out asap.

21st December 2002

Our gig in Fulham proved to be an eventful one at that! It was a bit of a mission to get there but with the hire of a van and Mike's Dad willing to drive us we were there in no time at all. And considering how far away it was, we had a big following there, which is always nice to see. Thank you to all who came. We forged friendships with a band called No Where Fast, who are really top guys from Oxford (or near there). Hopefully we'll be playing with them again at some point in the future. The gig was also video-ed by the venue so as soon as I can I will upload some clips (or maybe whole songs-who knows!)

16th December 2002

Literally just got home from our first gig with new drummer Red, and fuck me, what a gig! We ended up headlining over Dufuz and Martin - and we had a great time. A huge BIGGIT UP to Red for fantastic drumming and remembering all our songs after having only been with the band for a matter of weeks. Cheers to all the dedicated groupies and everyone who voted for us. After we came off stage we got interview for a punk website; the interview will be posted early next year. Not entirely sure of the email address but will keep you posted.
[Goc]


13th december 2002

ok so friday the thirteenth may not be all that great for some but it seems that half inch heroes have fallen lucky. our first practice with our new drummer red went stonkingly well, and we even managed to play roobarb correctly - now that's a turn up for the books! for those of you coming to the twells gig on monday keep your eye on forever late - i think you'll like it (we all do anyway!) it was good to have everyone back from uni and a general piss about true hih stylee. all of us are more than in gig spirit now!
[Goc]

24 october 2002

hey, hello and welcome, one and all to that rarest of things, an HiH update! muchos apologies to everyone for the lack of updates, but since I'm at uni its a bitch to upload these things, although Ive worked out how now, so u should get a few more of these. anyway, as those of you who saw us at the forum supporting lightyear will testify, our live sound hasn't been affected by our spell apart, and Id say that our new material has turned out rather nicely!

weve got some plans for a new ep recording, although what songs will be recorded, when and where are all yet to be decided. its a pretty vague plan at the moment. we also plan to tour at christmas, in a mini-tour type thing. the dates, venues and tour name are all to be confirmed, but Ive been told about plans for a gig in fulham, as well as a possible support slot with jesse james. the only concrete news I can bring you as of this precise second is that well be playing the collective at amar hall in dartford on december 13th, with the fulham gig provisionally pencilled in for the following friday (december 20th). Im kind of outta the loop news-wise up here, but as son as I know whats cockin with everything Ill let you all know. Check back on this page, the gigs page and the guestbook for concrete details as soon as we have them.

anyway, Im sure I should be doing some work right now no wait, Im as student, we dont do work! laterz.

[ross]

5 October 2002

A big thank you to everybody who came to the gig yesterday, it was a fantastic turn-out, packing the Forum to the brim. Due to the withdrawal of both No Comply and Southpaw, HIH landed the co-headlining spot making it one of our biggest gigs yet. A massive BIGGIT UP to lightyear for yet another punk rocking show stopping performance. Bloody nice bunch of peeps too. A special thanks to all those die-hard Half inch Heroes fans who missioned it back from Uni to see us - you guys rule! Thanks again to everyone and everything, especially Stella :) Roll on the next gig ... that's what I say!


[Goc]

13 august 2002

morning campers

well as Ross is another country I thought id take over again :)

its been a while since our last update, and not a great deal has happened in between except for one major event. and that is the sound gig. on the 27th we played an amazing venue to a resonably large group of hardcore diehard fans :) love you all who attented.. and sleep well all those who didnt... mwhahaha. muchious fun was had by all.. especially myself, as the kit was gorgeous. the HiH do apologise to all those who recieved injury due to fatty smokealot jumping on their heads.. and well done! it was a blindin gig enhanced totally by the skankers :) once again barney made us proud, as did everyone else.. it was also the discovery of the worlds greatest t-shirt.. "half inch heroes are bigger than god" a true legend in a true legend t-shirt! a hooge thanks to spankboy for being so damn good! and for being good even after like 6 hours sleep in a week! we currently have no gigs lined up as band ppl are on holiday and im doing my best to get a gig with jesse james at the end of the month. well if anything goes ahead it will be posted as soon as we find out. if we do get a gig before the end of sept you had all better get there casue it will be your last chance to skank your bums off to the sound of HiH as over half the band are disapeering to universities around the country, so get em while their hot and it doenst involve a mammoth train journey to a gig in scotland or sumthing stoopid. anyway.. im supposed to be working.. oops!

and rememeber.. if it sounds like a duck, and walks like a duck.. its probably a duck..

[pacey]

8th july 2002

well hello there. its been ages since the last update, due to a combination of appalling laziness from me and a lack of any real concrete news that i felt you lot needed to know! but now i have some. kind of.

first up, a reminder to one and all that we're playing on friday at the tunbridge wells forum supporting american hardcore band awkward thoughts, and bristol ska-corers five knuckle. it should be a ripper, and since we're now not supporting lubby nugget next friday (long, complicated and boring story. don't ask.) it'll be our last gig at the forum for now, so come along and help show all those hardcore guys that skapunk ain't just for kids. its gonna be a special night for one of our designated skankers too, with sas turning 18, so come along for a dash of birthday tomfoolery with your ska, as well as a sneak preview of some new songs we're working on...

also on the gig front we've now confirmed a gig at sound in leicester square, as part of the "x-treme live!" festival, on saturday july 27th. we're onstage at 2.50pm (i know its an early start for some of you) with the skanktastic (or should that be spanktastic) spankboy headlining at 8pm. make sure you grab a flyer from one of us, as we need to bring at least 50 hard-skanking people along for support. it should be a great day, with all kinds of ska, punk and metal represented, so come along and give it up for us and spankboy.

the ep is finished, printed and ready for mass consumption, as some of you are only too aware. the cover art is stonking, especially the cartoons in the liner notes, so grab a copy NOW! its available from any of us at shows, and sometimes when we're just generally hanging around at other peoples gigs...

anyway, i've run out of stuff to write, so i'll love you and leave you for now, and remember, clunk click every trip.

[ross]

19th june 2002

yup, its that time again, another irreverent and mostly irrelevant news update from the half inch heroes camp. firstly i would like to apologise on behalf of the band about the cancellation of the gig at the mjc. it was not our fault, and events way beyond our control meant that we couldn't put the show on. here is what happened, as best i can gather. you might have heard other things from people who work at the mjc, or even from other band members, but this is what i know.

on the monday before the gig was due to take place mike phoned the mjc to make sure everything was going ahead ok and to find out when they wanted him to drop the deposit money round. at this point he was told that the gig couldn't go ahead as there was no sound or lighting engineer to work on the night. we shat ourselves, panicked, and then realised we had nothing to worry about since my good mates steve and chris could easily handle the pressure cooker environment that is a half inch soundcheck. mike phoned the mjc back, and they said ok, but now there wasnt a duty manager available. mike then arranges to meet with the new amanager of the mjc (who's only been there a few weeks) to see what can be arranged. he tells us that it had been decided THREE WEEKS previously that the gig couldn't go ahead as he hadn't had time to settle in, and wasn't ready to host a "heavy rock" (his words) gig. now, fair enough, if he didn't think he could handle it yet, then he shouldn't let the gig go ahead. but to wait three weeks to tell us this is incredible. we had been at the mjc SIX times in that period to practice, and nothing had been said to us about this. had we known when the decision was made then we could have arranged an alternative venue, probably the nearby miskin road theatre. but alas, they didn't tell us until the monday before the gig, and so we had no choice but to cancel the event. we're going to work our arses off to rearrange the gig at the misking teatre for sometime in july probably, maybe the weekend the schools finish, as a kind of end of school punkrock party. or something.

anyway, we were left with nothing to do last weekend, so we decided that we should make something good come of a bad situation. so, we rang up the nice people at delta studios (in chartham in kent, near cantabury), and they said they had a vacancy on the sunday. so on sunday june 16th half inch heroes all bundled into their respective modes of transport (pacey rode a converted rickshaw for example) and made our way to the studio. there, with the able, patient and generally fantastic assistance of the chain-smoking engineer julian, we recorded our first ep (the generally chucklesome and somewhat silly diary of the day, complete with many many memorable quotes (including the now infamous "i thought a cul-de-sac was a boat" moment) will be uploaded to this very site just as soon as goc gets a chance between exams to type it up).

the ep is tentatively titled "death by jammie dodger", although i don't really like that, so it might alter. needless to say it'll be called something jammie dodger-related. the tracklisting is: drunken song; imperfections; forever late (teardrops on a smile); skank wit me; jammie dodger. goc is busy beavering away at the artwork right now, and once thats done and we've burnt a load of copies of it (we currently have only 7 master copies, one for each band member) they'll be available for the general pleasure/pain of the listening public. we're playing a couple of gigs in july (check out the gigs page), plus the rearranged mjc night, and we'll have a whole bunch of copies of it with us to sell at those. if you can't make any of those (and why the bejesus not?!?!?) then you can purchase one from any of us. they'll probably be about four quid, and for five tracks you can't go wrong.

anyway, that was a ridiculously long update, even for me, so i'll leave it at that. i'll probably think of something else to add to it later, but it'll do for now. nite.

[ross]

5th june 2002

hey, i'm not gonna try and pretend that this is gonna be a "quick" update, cos it most prolly won't, and i dislike lying to our loyal fans :P

anyway, jus thought i'd let you know how great all those of u who turned out on tuesday night to see us play wit sequana, drag, and mumm-ra were. it was a great night, and seeing such a sweaty mass of ppl skanking like that inspired us to even greater heights of dickish-ness onstage, as u could prolly have told from the fact that i was jumping around like a tit and kept hijacking the mic from goc. and to those of u who missed out on the fun, if u havn't been at a HiH gig in the last 24 hours, SHAME ON YOU!!! (i'm guessing pretty much no-one'll get that joke, but hey) and u can make up for ur lack of loyalty by all booking off work the evening of 15th june and bringing ur skanking boots down to the mjc. speaking of which, i(m)mune are now NOT going to be appearing on the night, i haven't been told why as i haven't spoken to laurie myself, but i'm sure they have a good reason. we might get another band to fill in for them, but i don't know yet.

in website-related news, pacey has either managed to completely bugger the guestbook, or sumthing else has gone spectacularly wrong with it. either way, it ain't working. so i've decided that the only solution is to kill pacey. or i guess i could jus tell u i've set up a forum-type message board thing at http://forums2.asp-dev.co.uk/halfinchheroes, whicheva works better for you...

anyway, i'm bored and i need a shit, so i'd better be saying goodbye for now... laters...

[ross]

24th may 2002

heya. just a quick update-ette to let you know that the line-ups for the gigs over the next few weeks have now been finalised, and we'll be yelling "biggitup" and all kinds of other nonsense alongside the following bands:

tuesday may 28th @ tunbridge wells forum: supporting mr shiraz, w/ i(m)mune

tuesday june 4th @ tunbridge wells forum: supporting i(m)mune w/ av-out (its a birthday type thing for ellie apparently)

saturday june 15th @ mick jagger centre, dartford: w/ 3db's down, 40 odd yards, i(m)mune

friday july 19th @ tunbridge wells forum: supporting lubby nugget, w/ no comply

as you can see, the line-ups have altered a little, as has the date of the lubby nugget gig. so make sure to change your diaries. also, we played a hastily-arranged gig at the courthouse pub in dartford (my regular choice of beer-drinking venue) last sunday evening (the 19th). we stepped in at the last minute to cover after my dad is big (now also known as my dad is taking the piss when he says he wants £500 to play at the jagger centre gig. or so i've been told.) pulled out and as a result we were hideously unprepared (yes, even more so than usual). but we got paid for it, so i can't really complain. i whole-heartedly apologise for anyone and everyone who had to listen to our dross, and i'd like to thank 40 odd yards for being so good and making people forget how shite we were. they're one of the new additions to the june 15th gig, so make sure you come down and check out their fantastic version of "leaving on a jetplane". and the rest of their set, obviously... and our's i(m)mune's and 3db's down's sets... oh dammit...

anyway, my "quick" updates always turn into essays, so i'm gonna leave it there for now. i'll try and put up an update after tuesday's gig if i can, so as to let you know whether it was another courthouse-esque fiasco. make sure you kids play safe until tuesday, then i wanna see some arse-kicking and skanking from each and every one of you at the forum. laters...

[ross]

20th may 2002

hello!! ok more news, the gig for the 15th of june at the mick jagger centre in dartford is almost completly confirmed, the line up to date is...(in no perticular order) 3db`s down, 40 odd yards, i(m)mune and us (half inch heroes) and maybe even not katies but they are unconfirmed to date. its gonna be a corker, so come on down and bring your friends and skanking pants cause its gonna be a wikimungo nite.

[pacey]

16th may 2002

hey, sorry for the absolute age since the last update, but i'm a lazy bastard. sorry. there's plenty of news-like news to tell you about, so i'll get right on with it!

firstly, we now won't be playing at the collective in dartford like we previously said we would, the reason being that we didn't get a demo to the geezer organising it in time. blame any of us you like for that. however, this does mean that we now have that weekend free for gigging. so, we are pleased to announce a gig on SATURDAY JUNE 15th at the mick jagger centre in dartford, alongside (provisionally) my dad is big, im(m)une, and another band to be announced at a later date (we're trying to get not katies to play, but that may or may not happen). we're also playing with av-out at the tunbridge wells forum on TUESDAY JUNE 4th. there'll be other bands there on the night, but we have no clue who they'll be. last, but far from least, we will be playing (again at the tunbridge wells forum) on FRIDAY JUNE 21st, supporting (you'll like this), the mighty, the incredible, the skank-tastic, LUBBY NUGGET!!! i'm practically wetting my pants i'm so excited about it, we only found out this evening, so i'm still quite moist from it all!

we've already polished off a new song, roobarb, the lyrics to which can be found on the lyrics page (shockingly). we'll also hopefully have finally finished fraggle ho by these gigs, so you'll get the joy of hearing sharpey's magnum opus at long last...

i've also posted a whole bunch of new pics from the last gig at the forum, there's loads on the pix page now, so it might take a little time to load. anyway, i'm off to have a quick toss over the thought of us supporting lubby nugget... till next time...

[ross]

6th may 2002

hey kids... i'm still absolutely fucked when i'm writing this, so please excuse any shitty spelling/typing! we're starting practice this week, hopefully with the addition of two mystery new horn players... well, maybe anyway, so long as we can find venues with stages big enough for 9 of us including pacey and mike's fat arses! we'll hopefully be getting a few more songs written in time for our next gig, whenever that may or may not be! there's a possibility we'll be opening for the mighty mr shiraz at the forum sometime soon, and therefore playing alongside i(m)mune once more... there have been a whole bunch of other gig suggestions thrown around, including playing alongside my dad is big and also 4ft Fingers. I'll try and update here as soon as i have the faintest clue what's going on! now if you'll excuse me, i'm going to go and throw up about 3 people's worth of breakfast! laters...

[ross]

me again! i've uploaded some pictures of us before our gig at Tunbridge Wells Forum on the 28th... More will follow! Till then, click here to see our ugly mugs!

[ross]

29th april 2002

hey, just a quickish update to say thank-you to a few people. last night's gig was fucking insane, and i wanna say thank you on behalf of the band to the following: flying marrows for their acoustic ska-type madness, and for the craziest skanking i've seen in a long time; av-out for putting us on a stage and letting us inflict our music on people; immune for being really slick and sounding shit-hot, and also for letting us nick their equipment. hopefully our paths will cross again in the very near future; lawrence at the forum for putting up with a really stupidly long soundcheck (sorry dude); EVERYONE who turned out on a wet and windy sunday night to go see a shitty little punkrock band play about a million miles away from home; and finally, a BIG thank you to whoever threw the jammie dodger that hit sharpey in the back of the head! the comic timing was impeccable, and the video footage (which might get pout up on this very site) of the moment of impact is priceless! thank you to one and all, thank you for kicking off in such a spectacular manner, thank you for the skanking, and the shouting, and the general punkrock ruckus. we ain't gonna forget it in a hurry, and we'll hopefully be bringing the ruckus to a venue a little closer to home very soon... cheers kids...

[ross]

17th april 2002

just a quick one this, to let you know that our mailing list is now live, and to join it just click here. you'll be updated with all the news as soon as we get it regarding gigs, releases etc. ok, i'm done now...

[ross]

16th april 2002

another update regarding the gig on the 28th, the final confirmed lineup (until it changes again) is, in order on stage: flying marrow, av-out, HALF INCH HEROES, immune. this means that we are now offfcially co-headliners, and as such w'ere gonna have to be good (cue ross and the rest of the band shitting themselves in unison). this also means that we need as much support there as humanly possible, so bring your friends along if you have any, and make the bitches skank! you will be rewarded... speaking of whch, any of you who do come along, could you please please please try and bring a flyer with you, and write your name on the back, so a) we can show the forum how many people we can bring in, and b) we can get all the names of everyone who comes to see us and put them all on the "thank you" list for the ep. anyway, my time would be much better spent trying to work out how the fuck we're gonna make a 5 1/2 song set last long enough to be co-headliners! see ya's...

[ross]

14th april 2002

hey again. just a quick update about the gig on the 28th, firstly abstrakt have pulled out due to illness to one of their number. hopefully it isn't serious, but they won't be appearing. its not clear who is gonna take their place, but the last thing that i heard was that there was a fairly high chance that tunbridge wells-based ska-core heroes ye wiles were going to step in. thats not confirmed yet, but they fucking rawk, so if they do play then its an even bigger reason to get your skanking boots on and get your arses down to the TUNBRIDGE WELLS FORUM on SUNDAY 28TH APRIL.

on the ep front, we've decided that we're not going to record it as a studio ep. however, the forum gig is being recorded from the sound desk, so we now intend to release "reasons for failure" as a live ep at the start of may. the tracklisting should stay the same however. if anything changes i'll try and update here, but its my birthday on friday, so i'll prolly be completely out of it for the whole of next weekend... me and riley are gonna be at the forum next saturday to see jesse james and ye wiles among others, and we'll prolly be handing out a load of flyers, so grab us then if you're there... till next time i'm sober enough to update...

[ross]

7th april 2002

as i said we would, we practiced like bitches at goc's house this week, and got a shedload done, and we've now got some special surprises lined up for the ep and stuff, so be prepared! lets jus say that we got mightily stoned over the two days, and we ate a shitload of jammie dodgers, resulting in some classic ideas for songs etc. it was mad, and we've got ourselves sorted.

you'll have noticed the site's got some new sections, check out our gigs page, and if you come here, please please please sign our guestbook! also, spread the word about us, we wanna get some big time support for our gig on the 28th. on that note, i've found out the names of the bands we're playing with, they've been added to the gigs page. we still hope that the ep will be finished for then, and we might have got some badges and shit to sell. we don't really know. anyway, i'm bored, so i'm off to chat up 15 year-olds...

[ross]

31st march 2002

you'll be shocked to learn that the ep's tracklisting has changed again. fraggle ho's gonna take too long to arrange to make it onto this ep, so the final (i hope) tracklisting is: 1. imperfections; 2. skank wit me; 3. forever late (teardrops on a smile); 4. second opinion. we're gonna be practicing like bitches this week, so hopefully we might get the ep recorded and printed in time for the release date of april 15th... fat chance...

on the gig front, we probably won't be playing with my dad is big for the dates mentioned before, but we do have one date confirmed. we'll be begging the pit to skank at THE TUNBRIDGE WELLS FORUM on 28TH APRIL, so if you fancy coming and supporting us, thats when to do it, and where. if that goes well then we might link up wit my dad for some gigs at the start of may. we'll see. we should have the ep with us at the gig, so it'll be a great oppurtunity to get it off us, and line our money-grabbing pockets. anyway, my computer has crashed three times while writing this piece, so i'll sign off again for now. laters.

[ross]

24th march 2002

its has, once again, been fuckin' ages since last update. well, our horn section has been re-jigged, and we now have beth on alto sax and cc on trombone... watch this space for news of our brand-new trumpet player too...

ep work has moved on slowly, we hope to now have it released on the 15th of april. the tracklisting has changed a bit again, it now goes like this: 1. imperfections; 2. fraggle ho; 3. skank with me; 4. forever late (teardrops on a smile); 5. second opinion.

we've possibley got some gigs lined up for the next few weeks, supporting our mates in my dad is big. we should, in theory, be tearing up the amersham arms, in new cross, on saturday 20th april, and possibley the mjc and leo's at sometime after that. keep an eye on this space for further details... till next time i can be arsed to update...

[ross]

10th march 2002

jesus, its been absolutely ages since last update. oh well, we've got a bunch of new songs written, and we're pretty much sorted on the ep front, we've just gotta get riley's 4-track fixed, so we can actually record it. hopefully we'll be able to get it recorded at easter some time. the ep's titled "reasons for failure" and the tracklisting is as follows: 1. imperfections; 2. forever late (teardrops on a smile); 3. fraggle ho; 4. second opinion. we might put a cover of favourite things from the sound of music on there too, but we haven't decided yet. the ep's also gonna have the fantastic guitar stylings of our newest member, goc (pronounced "jock"). if you see her at a show, or down the pub, or whatever, say hi. anyway, i'm bored with writing this shit already, so i'll love you and leave you for now. i'll try and update as soon as i know exactly when the ep will be available. when it is, it'll be available exclusively from his website and from us at shows, and there will be a strictly limited number available, cos most of them are gonna be sent out as demos to various industry types. anyway, see ya's laters.

[ross]

23rd january 2002

sorry for the lack of updates, but i actually have a life, and practising with the band always takes precedence over working on this crappy site. i'd like to welcome to the band our newest member, second saxophonist mike. a big warm welcome to mike, i'm sure that u'll be seeing alot of him...

in other news, we've got some new songs on the way, the lyrics will be posted in due course, and mp3s will follow soon. i apologise in advance for the quality of the sound files, as although they're being recorded on riley's shiny new 4-track, transferring them and encoding them to mp3 has been a big old bitch of a job. but they're better than nothing...

anyway, better go and finish writing my bassline for practice tomorrow. laters...

[ross]

18th december 2001

hey, hello and welcome. i'll begin uploading mp3's of some of our songs just as soon as they're recorded, til then you'll have to make do with the handful of lyrics we've so far posted. if you want details of gigs and crap, join the mailing list by hitting the "contact" button, and emailing us with your name and stuff... you can put anything you want on there, we're always happy to get mail from mad people. especially cute, female mad people...

[ross]

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